The Pornographic
History of
Rock n Roll
The story is simple. Its starts in the 1950's when white people steal rock and roll from black people who are too busy getting laid to notice. Then Elvis gets laid, then later he gets laid in the army. Then even later on than that fat Elvis gets laid. Buddy Holly gets laid as his plane crashes.
Then in the 60's The Beatles get laid, The Rolling Stones get laid, The Who gets laid. Jimi Hendrix gets laid. At Woodstock, everybody gets laid. At Altamont, the Hells Angels get laid, then stab people. The Grateful Dead get laid but they're trippin so hard they don't even realize it.
Then you have the seventies. Aside from disco, loose morals and even looser standards of "body hair grooming", you got Led Zeppelin getting laid, Black Sabbath getting laid, and Lynyrd Skynyrd getting laid while people shout "Free Bird" and hold their cigarette lighters in the air.
Then there's punk rock and more people get laid...IN ENGLAND.
Then in the 60's The Beatles get laid, The Rolling Stones get laid, The Who gets laid. Jimi Hendrix gets laid. At Woodstock, everybody gets laid. At Altamont, the Hells Angels get laid, then stab people. The Grateful Dead get laid but they're trippin so hard they don't even realize it.
Then you have the seventies. Aside from disco, loose morals and even looser standards of "body hair grooming", you got Led Zeppelin getting laid, Black Sabbath getting laid, and Lynyrd Skynyrd getting laid while people shout "Free Bird" and hold their cigarette lighters in the air.
Then there's punk rock and more people get laid...IN ENGLAND.
Then you have the 80's and hair metal bands. Since all the guys looked like chics anyways, I'll just have girls playing the bands and the groupies.
Freddie Mercury does NOT get laid. This ain't that kind of a movie.
It would be the Citizen Kane of porn.
It would also be four hours long, and shot entirely on my I-Phone.
Poor Freddy
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